Premature Planting

If you live here in the Northeast, you too were probably baffled and delighted by the unseasonably, record breaking hot weather last week. I'm talking mid to high 80's in mid March! Everyone went from layers of wool bundling to practically naked overnight. What also happened was a lot of overly optimistic, premature planting of gardens by people who figured it's now Spring, just because it actually is Spring. Big mistake. Lots of folks have now set themselves up for the bitter disappointment and frustration of frostbitten veggies and flowers when the arctic weather returns during "mud season".

This may seem like a stretch, but I think sometimes when we "prematurely plant", presuming certain outcomes, rather than patiently waiting for things to unfold, as sometimes they must, we set up avoidable aggravations down the road. (Isn't that what they mean by the saying, "Don't count your chickens before they hatch"?)
Some things, like the weather, cannot be controlled, counted on, or rushed, so try to be mindful of where you make idealistic presumptions which then govern your actions. In my case, when the temperature hit 83 degrees last week, I somehow resisted the urge to haul my 10,000 pairs of boots up to the attic to make room for my 15,000 pairs of open-toed, summer shoes. Good thing, because had I not, I'd now have frostbitten feet and boxes all over my bedroom, needing to be reloaded!
Be careful about what you count on!

Shivering,
Susan Lager
PS.  If you'd like more of my in depth, original articles about all kinds of issues, go to the "Products" page of my website www.SusanLager.com where you can buy them for a pittance. With Easter around the corner, you especially might want to purchase, "How To Avoid Disasters At Holiday Family Events" for useful tips.
If you're totally broke, approaching our beloved tax season, just subscribe to my site for a long list of "Free Reports" (Sign up button is on the right side of this page.) Whatever you do, STOP PLANTING VEGGIES NOW IF YOU LIVE IN NEW ENGLAND! BE PATIENT!

I'm Back! (And Refueled)

I know, it's been two weeks with me incognito, unfortunately not hanging out sipping Pina Colada's on a beach in the Caribbean. The much less lovely truth is that I've been getting my personal taxes ready for my accountant, working hours each day assembling documentation, and tabulating figures. I'd rather be tarred and feathered than endure this each year, so when I come up for air, I'm religious about rewarding myself and "refueling" with someone special. This time it was with my beloved "baby" sister, Laurelei, as I call her.

We spent more than four days yakking, shopping, site seeing, eating, speed walking, watching "Doc Martin" for hours on end, and yakking. Did I already mention that? It was pure heaven, partly because we're very well aligned in interests, but mostly because we adore and enjoy each other. Whenever she leaves to return to New York City, I feel a weird mixture of sadness and fullness - not only in relation to all the food we ate, but mostly related to the joy of our connection.

I'm telling you this because I think it's vital for everyone to have someone to "refuel" with. It doesn't have to be a family member if your family is "vile" (as Doc Marin says). It just needs to be someone you enjoy who meets you with good energy, so you can go back to the grind of whatever you need to do with a sense of connection, and the experience of living well with joy.
What relationships refuel you?

Cheers,
Susan Lager
PS.  The Wednesday, March 21st 8:30 PM Blogtalk Radio show has been rescheduled to Wednesday,
       April 4th at 8:30 PM.  I will announce the topic and guest soon, so stay tuned......

Blogtalk Radio Show! "Compassion, Unity, Fairness, and Fun" 3/7 8:30 PM

Tune in to my next BlogTalk Radio show for an open microphone session discussing my thoughts and your thoughts about compassion, unity, fairness, and fun in marriage and close relationships.
Share your questions and stories about these issues as you see them playing out in your own marriage or close partnership. Call in toll-free at 877-497-9046 or catch this episode live streaming through the web player on the right. If you can't join us live, catch the recorded show at:
www.BlogTalkRadio.com/SusanLager

Avoid Money Wars In Your Marriage!

This was recorded one year ago prior to tax time, but aside from dated information about my sites, it's all still very relevant. (If I wasn't so obsessed with getting my own taxes done, I'd record a fresh new video). What is your marital money agreement?

Keep the peace,
Susan Lager
PS.  Now, for more info about all kinds of relationship issues, you can buy inexpensive original articles of mine on my website, www.SusanLager.com on the "Products" page. If you'd first like to get a sampling of my original "reports" subscribe here and you'll get loads of great stuff!

Weird Days

How's this for a weird day:
I wake up to a spider lazily crawling across my hand. Go downstairs to find Mackey, my cat, has vomited into his food bowl. He's looking very bored as he sits illegally atop our only precious Italian leather chair.
I go onto my computer to check my email, only to find that all the information in the footer area of my website has mysteriously disappeared. My webmaster has also mysteriously disappeared, and no longer works for the hosting company.The weird day is now into full swing.....
I'm enroute to an orthopedic appointment when a Sirius XM radio show about affairs comes on, and before I know it, I'm on the air, excitedly chatting with the host, even though I'm in heavy traffic and now late for the doc. I meet with the doc who seems like he's stoned, show him the mysterious bump on my foot, and he tells me, no, contrary to public opinion, I won't need a major, bone-shaving operation, I just walk an awful lot, here's two cheap insoles, walk less. I get a parking spot directly in front of my building, so no need to walk. I see several clients, and they're all very appreciative and complimentary. I find as yet unidentified green things in my salad, but hungrily eat it anyway. I spend the next hour waiting to die. Nothing remarkable happens, except my fax machine won't work. I go to my mailbox, and there's nothing there, not even a coupon. I see some big strange thing swimming in the pond outside my window. Thom and I watch the early primary results, and Rick Santorum is neck and neck with Romney - in Michigan. I'm in bed, writing this at 10:30!
Some days are just weird.

I'm outta here,
Susan Lager
PS.  For more precious insights, go to my website, www.SusanLager.com
PSS.  You can now buy articles about all kinds of relationship dilemmas,
          each with helpful tools, through the "Products" page of the site!

Growing Through Grief Blogtalk Radio Show

For anyone who missed my 2/22/12  BlogTalk Radio show, "Growing Through Grief" with Ashley Davis Bush, psychotherapist, grief expert, and author of "Transcending Loss" and "Shortcuts to Inner Peace,"I would STRONGLY recommend that you tune into the recorded show by going to the site:
www.BlogTalkRadio.com/SusanLager. We had a record number of live listeners and callers because the subject was so compelling! We talked about how grievers can transcend loss, what the challenges are, and journey generally looks like. Callers shared their stories of loss and struggle, and Ashley helped them look at realistic expectations for the process, as well as some tools for dealing with significant losses, and getting to some meaning-making through it.
There are times when I wonder why I go to the trouble of dealing with such a time-consuming, challenging endeavor outside my day job, but not this time. I think anyone who has wrestled with grief and loss, (even if it's been about a deceased pet), will benefit from this episode. Trust me on this one.

Cheers,
Susan Lager
PS.  EXCITING NEWS! You can finally purchase original articles about various relationship issues on my  website! The store is open for business at long last! Go to: www.SusanLager.com and click on the
"Products" page. You'll find useful tools for all kinds of relationship situations and dilemmas.

Managing Loss

Here's some exciting news!

On Wednesday, February 22nd at 8:30 PM EST, my next BlogTalk Radio show will feature Ashley Davis Bush LCSW, psychotherapist and author of the best-selling books, "Transcending Loss", and "Shortcuts To Inner Peace."
We'll be dealing with the issue of grief, and how it can be a springboard for healthy growth. This show is a must for anyone dealing with the loss of a loved one, even the loss of a beloved pet. Bush, an expert in this arena, will shed light on the issue of healthy vs. unhealthy grieving, tools for meaning-making, and the appropriate role for partners around the loss.
Call in toll-free at 877-497-9046 to listen in, or to join us live on the air with questions or comments.
If you can't make it then, listen to the recorded show at your convenience by going to:
www.BlogTalkRadio.com/SusanLager
I'm sure it will be an enlightening episode.

Cheers,
Susan Lager